By Tony Pinto
Have you ever wondered what you would get if you put a bunch of old action movie stars in a movie? You would get “The Expendables” franchise which is the brainchild of Sylvester Stallone. With two already popular movies they decided to come up with a third, the cleverly titled “The Expendables 3.”
In this installment, we get Sylvester joined by the likes of Jason Statham, Harrison Ford, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Wesley Snipes, and way too many other people to name. With a cast so large, it’s hard for any one person to have any legitimate screen time.
The movie centers around Barney Ross (Stallone) as he leads his ragtag group of mercenaries known as the Expendables on a mission against Conrad Stonebanks (Mel Gibson). Stonebanks a one-time Expendable is now the bad guy selling weapons on the black market.
The meat of the movie is in the action scenes. Don’t come here looking for some grand story, because you won’t find one. You’ll be lucky to find any storyline out of this film except he’s the bad guy, so we need to capture him. It is action scenes after action scenes with a little bit of manly banter tossed in every once and a while.
None of the main action scenes seem the least bit realistic. Are to believe 10 mostly older men can take on a whole army? Would it kill this movie to be not so over-the-top?
You can see where this film is headed right away – the older action stars needing younger, newer action stars to help them take down the evil Stonebanks. The newer action stars are led by UFC cage fighter and Olympic judo medalist Ronda Rousey. As the only women and only person who looks like they could currently be an action star, we don’t see much of her. This is one of the major flaws of the movie.
Unquestionably the stars of the movie are Antonio Banderas and Mel Gibson. Everyone else in the film tries to take this movie seriously but they don’t. They take the roles they have and play them as caricatures of other roles they have had in the past.
Surprisingly, they seem like the only ones who put any real emotions into the characters they portray. They alone make this movie bearable at times when nothing else does.
Nothing about this movie is original. With Schwarzenegger spouting out old catchphrases at every turn like “Get to the choppa!” it’s old action stars doing what they once did best, just don’t tell them that.
It is way too long at over two hours. How long can you take explosions, people getting shot at, and all other types of senseless action?
The main question many of you have is whether to go see “The Expendables 3?” The answer to that is a simple yes. Does that mean it is a good movie? No it doesn’t mean it’s a good movie, but with all these stars aging quickly this may be the last opportunity to see them all in one place unless we get an “Expendables 4.”
Tony Pintos grade: C-